Go the f*ck to sleep - a memory inducing book

My good friend Lourdes sent me this very funny and all too real book Go the F*ck to Sleep by Adam Mansbach.   I think it is loosely based on us somehow.  As Chris read aloud, I was flooded with memories of sleepless nights and endless frustration.  It is funnier now looking back on it than when it was happening.  These two adorable and innocent boys could reduce us to cursing like sailors.

My baby is 15 today - let's eat cake - Texas chocolate cake

My first born is 15 years old today.  It's hard to believe and, indeed, time goes very quickly.  We jumped into his bed this morning, dogs and all, to sing him happy birthday.  This truly is what teenagers love...not, but he took it in stride.

I slipped on his shoes the other day as I took the dogs out.  He has man feet.  My feet (none too small at size 8) swim in his shoes (size 13).  My baby is grown up. He's not even finished growing. Sigh. I guess this is what they do.

Happy Birthday, Max! We love you dearly!

As is our tradition, he has chosen his bday dinner (sushi) and requested his cake - Texas Chocolate.  This recipe is from my mom and was a favorite of mine when I was a kid. Warning: this recipe isn't for the faint of heart.  It's rich, moist, delicious. Rich.  A treat once or twice a year.  Much more than that, I'd recommend consulting your cardiologist.  What's a cake if not a treat?!

I'll add a photo later, once I've made it.

Texas Chocolate Cake

cake ingredients:
2 sticks butter (1 cup)
1 c water
1/4 c cocoa
2 c four
2 c sugar
1 tsp baking soda
1/2 tsp salt
2 eggs
1/2 c sour cream

Bring to boil butter, water, and cocoa.
Combine dry ingredients - flour, sugar, soda, salt. 
Add hot mixture at once to flour mixture
Lastly add beaten eggs and sour cream.
Mix well.

Pour into greased 9.5 x 13.5 (3 qt) baking dish. 
Bake 350 degrees for 20 minutes or until inserted toothpick comes out clean.
Make icing while cake is backing and frost while warm.

frosting ingredients:
1 stick butter (1/2 cup)
6 tbsp milk
2 tbsp cocoa
1 box powdered sugar (2 cups)
1 tsp vanilla

Bring to boil butter, milk, cocoa. 
Add all at once to powdered sugar.
Add vanilla.
Mix well and pour on warm cake (icing will be runny and ooze into the corners - the best pieces).

Missing my little ducky || OM [one moment] meet up

This week, I had an empty feeling every day, all day.  Something was missing.  My heart ached a little.  My little E was gone from us for his first extended trip ever.

Each class in E's new school travels on a week long trip together. This year, his 5th grade class this year went to a beautiful 1500 acre ranch of Yellow Pine Forests where they could hike, explore, and bond together.  I understand that he will come back a changed boy (for the better).  He was so excited to go that he barely said goodbye to me when I dropped him off at school on Monday.

I've missed him since the moment he left.  Each day I've wondered what he's doing, where he is, if he's happy (I know he is/was).  It's hard to not be in communication with your child.  My rational side knows that his trip away was good for all of us.  My mommy side is all too aware that my baby is becoming more independent and a young man.

Shhhhh.  Please don't tell him about this post.  Duckies, baby, mom mush is totally not acceptable by his standards, but I really had to share this with you.

He comes home today and I'm so excited to hear about his adventures. I can't wait to hug him and simply sit and listen as he shares every detail.  It's been a long week for me but a week of extraordinary experiences for him. 

NOTE:  I've added Instagram or Flickr to the mix.  If you just want to share with a photo moment, just use #OMmeetup. 

Seeing my baby as a young man :: OM [one moment] meet up

My oldest started his freshman year of high school this week. My time with him at home is fleeting.  Without completely gushing about him (which would tick him off), I'll simply say I'm so proud of him and feel so fortunate to be his mother.

My moment this week was sitting in the stands watching him play in his first high school football game (#74). He started (and played the entire game) on offensive and defensive tackle. I never considered myself a soccer mom, but I was definitely a hoot'n and a holler'n football mom. My youngest son had to move away from me because he was so embarrassed. I vacillated between cheering for him and declaring he looked injured.

"Woo hoo!" 

"Is he limping? His ankle looks like it's bothering him."

"Get him!"

"He looks tired."

My husband told me to stop "mothering" him.  Really?!  That's who I am and what I do.  I'll mother him 'til the day I die.

What was your moment this week?

A positive mommy moment - OM [one moment] meet up

E in his new school uniform, looking sharp.

The other afternoon, E (9yo) sadly came into the house from playing with some neighbor friends outside.  He had experienced something, with one of the adults, that caused him dismay.  It was a situation where he read into the adult's expression and it made him feel badly.

One of the most challenging things in parenting is teaching your child a life lesson that has gray areas.   Relationships are nuanced and sometimes that is easily lost on kids, even adults at times.

We talked about the situation for quite a few minutes.  I felt like I wasn't getting through to him, as I often feel in these types of conversations.  But, we kept talking...and talking.  Suddenly he said, "Thanks, Mom.  You've made me feel much better about it."

Such a great feeling to have made him feel better and to know he was processing what I was saying.  That moment really made my week.

I want to hear about your week.  Did you have a revelation?  Did something funny happen?  Please share!
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The mom voice: slightly scary, kinda funny, and alotta Chris Farley - OM [one moment] meet up #42

photo by Amadika

Years ago, before we had kids, I worked in an art center on the Main Line just outside Philly.  I worked with a lovely woman who had 4 kids ranging in age, at that time, from 9 years to 17 years of age.  She was the perfect mom:  patient, fun, caring, sweet, etc.  Everything I knew I wanted to be when I had kids.

One day, she was on the phone with one of her kids.  I wasn't paying attention to her conversation until I heard her voice change.  I don't recall what she said, but distinctly remember how she said it.  It was an unearthly bellow from the pit of her stomach.  It sounded so unlike her that it frightened me.  When she got off the phone, she turned to me and in her normal sweet and soft voice said, "You just witnessed the mom voice."

The mom voice?

What the heck is the mom voice?

I could never possibly create that kind of guttural sound.  And my sweet, innocent children would never push me that far.

Fast forward 14 years...

The boys were arguing, as they do most of the time, as we were trying to leave for music lessons.  [note:  there is almost 5 years between them so they don't have a lot in common other than verbal assault.]  Their cacophony of words crescendoing as they entered the car.  When I opened my door, it was if a sound bubble floated out and burst.  I closed the door and lost it.

Stop it!!!  Just stop it!! 

The mom voice came out.  It reminded me of Chris Farley in the Gap Girls skit (watch and you'll get the idea).





The kids immediately stop and hold their breath in shock and maybe a little fear.  Is she going crazy?

As we drove off, I was aware that the entire neighborhood, and perhaps town, just felt their windows vibrate.  I was frustrated and exhausted, but slightly relieved.  What a release.  In that very moment, I realized that we all have that mom voice deep inside.  Even with the best parenting intentions, we will have moments of losing it.  It was okay.  The kids were okay, if not entertained.  I just hope it never happens in public.

 OM is a weekly meet up that promotes living in the moment.  Whether funny, sad, ridiculous, or banal, actively looking for and sharing these moments will promote balance in our lives.

Share in the blog comments here, on your own blog (and link back below)  or on my Facebook fan page. If you are on Twitter,  use hash tag - #omMeetup so we can converse if we'd like. We'd love to hear your moment this week!

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OM [one moment] meet up - week #9 - parenting can suck

[caution children switchplate, $10]

First, let me say that I'm really sorry this week's OM for me isn't of the positive sort.  I'm sure by the time I'm finished writing it, I'll find something to say that is remotely positive (because that is what I do to survive).  This week is more about being honest with my feelings and hoping to relate to others.

I've had a tough parenting week.  I won't bore you with the details, but I'll give you a rundown of the various separate incidents involved:

• missing child (no worries, he was found)

• deliberate deception

• x-rays

• overflowing toilet (of the worst kind)

Yes, all in one week! These were above and beyond our normal parent/child struggles this week.  I'm exhausted.  It is really hard being a parent sometimes.  I find myself shaking my head and asking both myself and my kids, "what were you thinking?"

These parenting issues have always been the same.  Kids find ways to get what they want.  It's a part of growing up.  Didn't we all think that the ends justifies the means?!   But the consequential end result is always the same:  frustration, anger, resentment, cold shoulder, slammed doors, pouting - from either parent or child).  [I didn't do the slamming door part.]

Parenting can really suck!  No matter how you slice it, we all go through this as both parents and kids.  I guess my "moment" this week was saying this out loud and then enforcing the rules and consequences I've now set up.  It's hard to punish your children.  It's hard to stay consistent with the punishment.  But it would be an even harder lesson learned if I didn't follow through with this.  I'm sticking to my guns.  Don't do the crime if you can't pay the time!  [channeling my inner Baretta and revealing my age here].

I need a drink.

So here is the positive spin...Yesterday, while wallowing in parenting self-pity, I read this blog post by Jessica Gottlieb -You stuck that where?  I follow Jessica on Twitter and often read her blog.  Her post made me laugh and relate.  It made me realize I'm not alone in this parenting vacuum.  We all have our moments!

What was your 'one moment' this week? What took you out of your present moment and made you wonder, scream, remember?

Share in the blog comments here, on your own blog (and link back below) or on my Facebook fan page. If you are on Twitter, I've started a hash tag - #OMmeetup so that we can converse if we'd like. We'd love to hear your moment this week!

Hump Day Humor: Parenting problem solving

Okay, what's a baby shower without funny parenting stories! So, I'm going to share a real life story from my own parenting archives.


When my oldest son (now 13) was just months old, we were flying him around the US (by plane) to introduce him to various relatives. As we were boarding a small aircraft, my husband was holding M over his shoulder. We had just finished feeding M some peaches which he proceeded to spit up all over C's shoulder. Realizing we didn't have time to change M (not to mention we were out of clean clothes) and the line was moving, a decision had to be made. Thinking quickly, C looked at the spit up (essentially just peaches) and licked it off his own shoulder. No one knew the better. Of course, that story is repeated often.

Do you have a funny parenting story to share with Lindy?

Don't forget to enter today's giveaway!! Click this Blog Baby Shower link here. Today's giveaway ends tonight at midnight EST.